I'm thirty...

I turned the big 3-0. And I don't feel any older. I know for many people, thirty is a huge deal. They feel like they've suddenly come face to face with how old they really are.

I guess I already have.

Seriously. I spend most of my days taking care of my kids, one of whom will be heading to kindergarten next year. I find the occasional gray hair and the not so occasional "smile line." Some mornings my legs or back are really stiff when I get out of bed. And after two kids, one who joined us via c-section, well... let's just say I definitely don't feel like I have the body of a twenty-something anymore.

So, I guess thirty didn't really sneak up on me.

That, or I just haven't really thought about it much yet. I mean, I am terrible at getting stuck in time warps. To me, Snapple will always be "that cool new drink with the lady answering questions on the commericals." Seattle grunge rock will never belong on a classic station. A part of me will always think that black hats with huge flower pins on big hair (a la Debbie Gibson) is a good look. There are kids I taught in VBS years ago who are in college- Yeah, college- and to me, they are still sometimes that kid from my little four-year-old class. Often my hubby & I will read an article about something and think "that wasn't that long ago, only 1995." And then we realize 1995 was almost fifteen years ago, which is, in fact, classified as that long ago to most people.

So maybe thirty will still creep up to surprise me with a reality check in the next few weeks.

I was surprised by my husband, who brought flowers and Gigi's cupcakes to work. And by one super cool person (and an accomplice, perhaps?) who sent me a big box of sentimental candy from Old Time Candy Company. And other birthday greetings, including a really special book from my dad.




We had yummy Italian food at a local restaurant where you eat free on your birthday. The girls were great even though it was a late dinner. They even gave me one last gift and fell asleep on the way home.

Happy Birthday to me.

Not Me! Monday

I definitely did not snap these pictures over a month ago, and debate about sharing them on my blog until now.




I mean, who would let their kid play in the dog cage? And who would snap pictures of it? Not me!



And after not allowing this to happen once, I most certainly did not have to start locking the cage all the time because it became an obsession for our little explorer. And one morning when I was getting the diaper bag all packed to leave the house, Little Sister did not find it accidentally unlocked, climb in, and scratch her arm on the side of it. She does not still have a tiny pink scar to show that this was all, in fact, a very bad idea.

As in the above pictures, I am never guilty of photographing silly or slightly icky things that my kids do before intervening... in fact, I did not just take a few hundred photos after Little Sis found the clean laundry and decided to put my (clean!) underwear over her head and dance around the kitchen while I made dinner.

But DaddyClay says I can't share those photos...

Oh yeah, one more thing...

I most certainly did not finish this post on Wednesday rather than Monday. I would never put up multiple days of blog entries at the same time. I always keep up to date. I mean, who back dates a blog?

Not me ;)

Song for Sunday: Oh, Let the Ancient Words Impart

We sang this song in Kids Worship this morning. It's got a beautiful melody, but its lyrics struck a special chord with me today. I've been discussing Scripture a lot lately with some ladies on the Blog Frog. I'm thankful for God's wisdom, changing me, day by day.

Ancient Words
by Michael W. Smith


Holy words long preserved
for our walk in this world,
They resound with God's own heart
Oh, let the Ancient words impart.

Words of Life, words of Hope
Give us strength, help us cope
In this world, where e'er we roam
Ancient words will guide us Home.

Ancient words ever true
Changing me, and changing you.
We have come with open hearts
Oh let the ancient words impart.

Holy words of our Faith
Handed down to this age.
Came to us through sacrifice
Oh heed the faithful words of Christ.

Holy words long preserved
For our walk in this world.
They resound with God's own heart
Oh let the ancient words impart.

Ancient words ever true
Changing me, and changing you.
We have come with open hearts
Oh let the ancient words impart.

We have come with open hearts
Oh let the ancient words impart.

Watercolors

Big Sister has become quite a little artist lately:


I know I'm biased, but I think her work is quite lovely.

Doctor Drama

The next time that I think I can take both girls to the doctor for a check-up by myself, take me to the doctor. Or the mental hospital.

Or at least call ahead there, because I'll be self-admitting by the time the visit is over.

My first mistake was not scheduling it waaaay in advance like apparently everyone else who visits our practice. Apparently, a month and a half is not enough notice to get the "good" appointment times. So I ended up with 12:45. I'm guessing every mommy is nodding their head in complete understanding as they read this, but just in case you don't know why 12:45 is the poopiest time to go to the doctor, there is ONE reason: NAPTIME. At 12:45 every child in the Eastern Time zone was settling in for their afternoon nap- every child except for those who were enduring the doctor's visit from H-E-double hockeysticks.

My second mistake was running late. I put Little Sister down for an early nap at 11, and set Big Sister up with a movie on my bed so that she could rest and have some downtime. Both girls had gotten up fairly early, so it wasn't completely crazy to give them an early rest time. I even let Big Sis eat a plate of nachos and apples in my bed while she watched Little Mermaid. (side note: I pulled up the comforter very tightly so as to prevent little tiny shards of tortilla chips from making it between my sheets. When I came in a few minutes later, she was snuggly settled under my blankets, and so was half of her lunch. Sigh.)

When I finally woke Little Sis and loaded the girls up, I realized I should have started about five minutes earlier. But since we still waited in the waiting room for a while, I don't think the lateness had much to do with what was to come...

My third mistake was not realizing how many shots were in store for Big Sister. Little Sis is still at the stage where she gets poked almost every time she goes into the doctor. But Big Sis hasn't had shots in quite some time. Like, in enough time for her to have forgotten that she has ever had them. And when I realized what was in store, I didn't really realize just what was in store. After the doctor told me what we needed, I turned to my big girl and said, "yeah, you're going to have to have a few shots to keep you healthy."

Or maybe I said, "Yeah, in a few minutes, we're all going to leave, and a giant monster is going to come in here, turn off all the lights, kidnap you, and eat all of your toys." At least, that's how she reacted. Complete horror. As if all of her worst nightmares had come true.

It's no secret to anyone who has met my daughter (or read this blog for very long) that she is complete drama queen. But the magnitude of the drama at the doctor's office was surprising even to me. She cried. She screamed. She sobbed. She tried to run for the door. She asked me to drive her home. Repeatedly. Sometimes she just repeated the mantra "home, sweet, home" over and over. One time, she seriously looked up at me with tear-filled eyes and said, "I think I'll just have to drive myself home." By that time, I was almost ready to hand her the keys.

She said that in the bathroom. Where I was supposed to be catching a urine sample. From my four year old. While accompanied by my 16-month-old. And I was going to write her name on it and stick it in the little door over the sink, and then we'd wash our hands while singing our special handwashing song, and then skip past the rainbows and unicorns into the room where she would get her blood test...

HA! Here is what really happened... we walked into the bathroom, and Little Sister walked straight to the toilet saying "Bobby (potty) Bobby bobby" and proceeded to put her hands all the way in. She grabbed under the rim. You know, the part for which they had to redesign toilet cleaner bottles, just to try to get some of the intense nastiness of that out of reach part- yeah, she definitely just curled her fat little fingers right under there...

I grabbed her up and washed her hands and tried to stay patient. I even sang the handwashing song. Until I heard something else- a familiar "tinkle" noise. And I looked over to find Big Sister sitting on the toilet. And my hopes at actually obtaining that urine sample were about to be flushed away.

It was a very Froggy moment. I fussed at her, making her name much loooonger than it usually sounds.

"Whaaat?" She asked, but then immediately realized that she hadn't saved anything to catch in the empty cup I still held in my hand. "I'm sorry. I couldn't wait." She said. "You can just scoop it out of the toilet." She reassured. I started to explain to her why that wouldn't work, until Little Sis got her hand really close to helping me scoop some out whether it worked or not. I picked her up, scolded her & sat her down (again) on the other side of the bathroom, turned to finish with Big Sister, and stopped. I breathed. I said a little prayer and reminded myself that I love these children. And then we all washed hands, flushed, and get the HECK out of that crazy room.

But then we headed into the lab, and the tech and I had to physically restrain my four-year-old in order to stick her finger. I had to hold her opposite hand because she was grabbing & swiping at the tech to try to stop the process. Little Sister just stood there, watching, wondering what in the world was the matter with her "siss-see" and when she could go back to play in the water.

From the lab, we went back to the exam room. By this point, I was over it. Big Sister was still talking about driving home, repeating "home sweet home," screaming, everything. If she had ever seen the Wizard of Oz, she would have clicked her heels until her shoes were scuffed. The exam room was stark and empty, and the crying reverberated off of the walls at an ear-splitting volume. I finally told her that she was hurting our ears, and Little Sister & I stepped out of the room.

The drug rep in the hallway looked at me like I was nuts. The nurse seemed to understand, but still watched curiously. I explained, "We have a lot of drama at our house. I've found that if you remove the audience, the drama sort of dies down." I left the door cracked and watched to see if she would calm down. It took a little bit, but she finally caught her breath and we went in and read a book until they came in with the shots.

Little Sister went first, because she usually gets over them very quickly, and I wanted to show Big Sister how simple it really was. But since Big Sis was once again screaming like a madwoman, Little Sis didn't calm down quite so quickly. And I was finding it hard to hold & comfort her while getting her supposedly older sibling to stop-running-around-don't-open-that-door-just-come-over-here-and-it-will-all-be-over-soon. The nurse & I had to hold Big Sister down. She looked like she could have been in some terrible made for tv movie about a horrible mental health facility. I'm pretty sure I told her she was being ridiculous. I also know that at some point I just thought about the madness of it all and had to laugh.

Just about that time, the last shot was finished. And I looked down to see Big Sister laughing too. Out of relief, I'm sure. But I think she also realized that it wasn't NEARLY as bad as she had (over) anticipated.

They handed her a caramel apple sucker. Little Sister wanted one, but they didn't give her anything. I scrounged around and found some goldfish to avoid the fighting. I'm not sure why they didn't at least give her a sticker- she was actually the brave one! And me... I felt bad for my babies and their big band-aids, but I also felt exhausted. Where was my sucker?! When we finally drove off, I stopped and got myself a Route 44 Cherry Lime-Aid.

So there was ONE upside to the appointment- we were finished in time for happy hour at Sonic.

Okay, there were more than just one upside. My children checked out to be perfectly healthy, and they slept really well last night.

And next time, it's Daddy's turn.

muwah-hahaha.

"Flood"

Not the song by Jars of Clay.

Not the album by They Might Be Giants.

The real thing...





It took me three times as long as usual to get to the church for Mom's Morning Out today. I had to turn around and reroute three times.




And wait on a few RVs from this lot to cross the street into dry ground.

Hubby's golf league won't be playing tonight...


BUT...

The sun is shining!

Rain, rain, go away...

It has been raining here since... well, I honestly can't remember. But for the past few days it has been raining hard.

Which is why the ceiling in the girls' room is soggy.

And why there are muddy old bath towels and doggy footprints all over the place. And why I've given up on keeping my floors clean.

And why the smell of wet dog is rivaling the Harvest tart in the tart burner.

And why two little sniffly girls are slowly going stir crazy. (Little Sister keeps going to the front door, knocking on it, and saying, "walk" or "'side?" or bringing me her shoes. When I let the dogs out & close the door without letting her go out on the back deck, she tries to bite me.)

And also why I have a newly reignited appreciation for PBS kids!

And why our local school district is closed tomorrow for flooding.

And (I fear) why it smells musty each time the air conditioning kicks on downstairs. I am afraid to brave the mud and look in the crawlspace. I also think whatever it is (mold?!) is making us sick- Little Sister woke up with what we call the "green globs" this morning, and I've been listening to her little coughs through the monitor all evening.

But we're fortunate.

We're dry.

We've got everything we need.

We're in our own home.

My thoughts & prayers are with those who had to leave their homes, who are sleeping in shelters or bunking with friends tonight.

Song for Sunday: Traveling Outside of Karma

Grace
by U2

Grace, she takes the blame
She covers the shame
Removes the stain
It could be her name

Grace, it's the name for a girl
It's also a thought that changed the world
And when she walks on the street
You can hear the strings
Grace finds goodness in everything

Grace, she's got the walk
Not on a ramp or on chalk
She's got the time to talk
She travels outside of karma
She travels outside of karma
When she goes to work
You can hear her strings
Grace finds beauty in everything

Grace, she carries a world on her hips
No champagne flute for her lips
No twirls or skips between her fingertips
She carries a pearl in perfect condition

What once was hurt
What once was friction
What left a mark
No longer stings
Because Grace makes beauty
Out of ugly things

Grace makes beauty out of ugly things


Lyrics from u2.com

Just Perfect...

Today started out kind of yucky.

DaddyClay had to go to the church super early to get ready for a day of Upward soccer & flag football. Little Sister got up to nurse a little after 6 and never went back to bed, and just when I got her settled in with Baby Einstein so I could have a-cup-of-coffee-and-a-moment-to-myself-so-I-am-not-a-ginormous-grump-all-day-long-thank-you-very-much, Big Sister peeked her head around the corner ready to start her day. (And there is no 1st gear for her in the morning. She wakes up going- and talking- a mile a minute.)

After breakfast and a little playtime, we were getting ready for Big Sister's soccer game. Only I couldn't find her shinguards. And the attic steps were folded up so I couldn't go get the camping chairs. And a train decided to park on the tracks between here and the church. So we were the teensiest bit late to her game. Again. We're that family.

And then when we got there and got Little Sister buckled into the umbrella stroller, the heavens opened up. We had no umbrella. She had no canopy. I had no just a little bit of patience. This was just perfect.

We ran into a family from church who offered us their camping chairs. Daddy tracked down a few umbrella's from the storage room. We settled in on the sidelines, watching the kids play the game in a downpour.

Big Sister kept sticking out her tongue, trying to catch rain drops. Needless to say, she was not the star player this week, either.

Little Sister sat in my lap the whole game. Only once did she ask to "walk" but the rest of the time she was sweetly mellow and snuggly. I guess maybe the early morning wasn't totally a bad thing after all.

At the half, they called the games for rain and the kids rushed under the pavilion to get their stars and their snacks. Little Sis & I stayed huddled in our borrowed chair under our borrowed umbrella until a few people helped us move everything to semi-dry ground.

After everyone had left, the girls and I waited on the hubs and watched with a few others as he & his assistant picked up the balls & goals via golf-carts. We laughed as they attempted donuts in the rain.

Big Sister snuck into the concession stand where they promptly gave her a different kind of donut. I've lost count of how many we've eaten today! (Donuts are the one food I'd need if I were on a desert island. Or anywhere else. Just in case you ever needed to buy me food know that).

We loaded up to go home, cranking the defrost (and heat, since we were all soaked and Big Sis was just wearing her undershirt, since her uniform was in a soggy pile at the foot of her carseat.) Little Sister nibbled on some goldfish and promptly fell asleep. When we got home, I put her in bed, wrapped Big Sis in a blanket in front of Babar, started a big pot of soup, and ran a hot bath for the soggy soccer player.

As I walked downstairs to get Big Sister ready for her bath, it hit me. The chill in the air (helped by my damp clothing). The smell of spiced candles and simmering soup with bay leaves. The snuggly kids and the Pumpkin Spice Latte in the hand of my drenched husband as he walked in the door and turned on a football game. It's Fall.

Just perfect.

Five Question Friday

I really enjoyed reading some of the other posts for Five Question Friday this week, and decided once more to join in the fun. You can too- just copy these questions and answer them, and then link to your post on the MckLinky below. Thanks Mama M!


1. What's your favorite line from a movie?
2. What "group" did you belong to in high school? Goths, jocks, preps, drama, nerds?
3. If you had $1000 just for yourself what would you spend it on?
4. What was your favorite childhood cartoon?
5. What kind of sleeper are you? Back? Tummy? Side? Sprawler?

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1. What is your favorite line from a movie?

I am having a REALLY hard time picking just one. In our house, we throw out movie references as much as Rory & Lorelai. So I guess I'll just share a few that come to mind:

"We came on the rocket car!" ~ Rat Race

"We'll sell t-shirts saying 'I slapped Oiuser Boudreaux!' Hit her!"~ Steele Magnolias

and a more serious one... "...we're too young to realize certain things are impossible. Which is why we will do them anyway." ~ Amazing Grace

2. What "group" did you belong to in high school?

I went to an all girls Catholic prep school. Our cliques were a little different! I mean, we still had the athletic girls and the preppy girls and the artsy girls, but we only had 150 in our graduating class, so we were kind of mixed together. A lot of my friends were preppy, but some of us were hippy or grunge-ish too. A lot of us spent our afterschool time in the music or drama department, but we were also the calculus and AP physics crew too.

3. If you had $1000 just for yourself, what would I spend it on?

Hmmm... There was a day when I would have said "Shoes." To be honest, I probably would get myself something small like a new shirt or a massage, and then end up spending it on my kids or putting it toward something we're trying to pay off- our new car, student loans, the mortgage... We're not strict Dave Ramsey followers, but we do like to try to keep our expenses in check and try to get rid of our debt.

If this is a poopy answer and I HAVE to pick something for myself, I would buy stuff for the house. I'd head to an antique shop and get a cute buffet for my dining room, some organization/storage for our newly converted playroom, and some yummy fall candles, soaps, etc.
4. What was your favorite childhood cartoon?

I wasn't much of a cartoon kid. When I got to choose, it was something on Nickelodeon. I remember watching Danger Mouse, The Little Prince, Belle & Sebastian- a show which NO ONE but me remembers,by the way, but just to prove it existed, here is a picture:

5.What kind of sleeper are you? Back? Tummy? Side? Sprawler?

I'm a tummy sleeper. Pregnancy was extra-exhausting because I couldn't sleep well if I couldn't sleep on my belly! I was super bummed after Little Sister was born, since she came via c-section, that I couldn't go back to laying on my tummy right away. In fact, I remember trying it WAY to soon, and I got stuck! I was upstairs, away from everyone else, and I wondered if I was just going to have to lay there until they found me! I had to roll & scoot centimeters at a time, rest in between, and brace myself with way too many pillows, just to finally get out of the bed.

"There You Go" Thursday

I kind of did this as a joke two weeks ago, but it sure did help me focus and figure out what to write. So it's time for round two!

Have you ever wondered what a jujube is? Or how they grow? Or what you can do with them?
(no? oh. well... humor me, okay? I find this interesting...)

When we moved into our house four years ago, we knew we had some Asian fruit trees in our front yard. We had a Persimmon tree (the guy who put in our fence killed it when he moved it & waited 48 hours to put it back into the ground). We had two Asian Pear trees (one died, one is in the process... I'm not sure what's going on). And we have two other fruit-bearing trees that are NOT dying. Actually, they are thriving. And for four years they have deposited heaps of rotting unknown fruit onto the ground.

Until now.

Because I finally figured out what they are! They're jujube trees- they grow Chinese dates.


When they are ripe, they look like this.


You can eat them when they are fresh; they're kind of like dryer, less sweet baking apples. Or you can dry them, which is why I am looking on freecycle & craigslist for a dehydrator. Or you can make jujube butter with them, which I hope is good, because it is what a lot of you will be getting for Christmas. (surprise!)

Apparently the fruit, as well as the leaves and bark, have holistic health benefits as well. So you could make teas or poultices or essences or something.

Or you can let your dog eat them (instead of everything else in the house including a Snappi diaper fastener that you really wish you'd noticed before she destroyed it). See? Nutritious, and helpful...


SO... JUJUBES.

There you go.


Before someone freaks out, no, I'm honestly not 100% sure these are ok for dogs to eat. But no, I didn't really GIVE it to Sophie to eat. And she didn't wait for me to google "jujbes safe dog" before she stole one and ate half of it. So far she is her crazy self, so I think they're safe. But I'm NOT really recommending them as dog treats. It's called humor. Or at least an attempt...

Little Sister Speaks

Our sweet Little Sister is starting to say quite a few (darling) words. She isn't quite as verbal as her sister was at this age, but that is probably due in part to Big Chatterbox Sister's continued, er, vocal abilities... Sometimes I'm surprised Little Sis has managed to get ANY words into the conversation!

But she has. Quite a few really:

Mommy, Daddy, Siss-see, Baby, Al, Sophie (I'm pretty sure she fussed at her today!)

Mo', yum-yum, eat, bite, bib, cup

Sit, shoes, uh-huh, uh-uh, walk, water, ball, that, 'side (in or out), bubbles, chalk, see, book, light,

bye-bye, hi (the cutest little "hi" in the whole wide world, by the way), nigh-nigh

eyes, toes, hair (I've only heard that one once), and belly...


'lright, yay, and Hooray!

Song for Sunday: A new law

This is another song from the Mockingbird album. It's quite possibly my favorite. Although it doesn't read like a beautiful poem, it definitely has profound meaning.

A New Law
by Derek Webb

Don’t teach me about politics and government.
Just tell me who to vote for.
Don’t teach me about truth and beauty.
Just label my music.

Don’t teach me how to live like a free man.
Just give me a new law.

I don’t wanna know, if the answers aren’t easy,
so just bring it down from the mountain to me.

I want a new law.
I want a new law.
Give me that new law.

Don’t teach me about moderation and liberty.
I prefer a shot of grape juice.

Don’t teach me about loving my enemies.

Don’t teach me how to listen to the Spirit.
Just give me a new law.

I don’t wanna know, if the answers aren’t easy,
so just bring it down from the mountain to me.

I want a new law.
I want a new law.
Give me that new law.

What’s the use in trading a law you can never keep
for one you can that cannot get you anything?

Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.
Do not be afraid.


"Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever.
So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." John 8:35-36

First soccer game of the year

Or Why I Am Almost Glad My Daughter Got Hit In The Face With A Soccer Ball

Saturday was the first game day for Upward Soccer. Big Sister "played" with the three-year-old team last year, but this is her first year for weeknight practices and "real" games against another team. Judging by these first photos, you might think she is a serious soccer player:




You would be wrong.


She had a lot of fans though. Nana & Papa are in town, so they came to cheer.


Little Sister had especially high expectations. She was a demanding fan...


...until she got sleepy and snuggly.


Big Sister spent most of the game simply running with the pack of kids who were going after the ball. There were some moments when she seemed to actually want to go for the ball, and a few times she got to do a corner kick or dribble down the field (she is a pretty good dribbler). But there were also a few times when she seemed to be completely uninterested.

And then she got nailed.

Let me be clear about this. My subtitle above does not mean that I found any sort of glee in seeing my daughter take a soccer ball in the mouth. For one thing, I was quite concerned. For another, I didn't actually see it. I was probably talking to my parents, or gawking at how much bigger the other kids were, or trying to figure out the name of one particular little girl boy on our team. (Not kidding- I thought he was a little girl until several hours later when the hubs told me otherwise!)

So, when it happened I rushed over and checked out my wounded player. She was fine- just shaken up and completely horrified at what had just happened, as well as at the idea of returning to the game. Nana & I both comforted her for a minute.

Then, I remembered a story about my roommate's sister and the time she fell off of her horse. Her mom made her take the horse back to the barn, put up the saddle, and do whatever else was needed to finish her ride, before they took her to the doctor. She had a broken arm, but her mom (a nurse, by the way) knew that if she didn't finish that ride, she would never get back on a horse again.

So, I asked our big girl to try to catch her breath and dry her tears. I took her back to the sideline and told her daddy that I wanted her to go back in the game as soon as they were ready. The tears came again, and I felt horrible as he led her by the hand onto the field. Was I doing the right thing?

I think so. After a few minutes, she was fine. She was a maybe a teensy bit more concerned about getting injured, but she was still playing! At the end of the game, she earned the gold star for perseverance, or as she said, "because I was tough!"

So, am I glad that she got hurt? Of course not. But am I glad that she was able to see that she is strong enough to overcome a soccer ball to the face? Absolutely. Am I glad that she kept playing, even when she had every reason to turn in those too-cute cleats? Definitely. I hope that she develops a tenacity and determination to keep going when the going gets tough- something I know I lack all too often.

And besides, it was nothing a little snack and juice box couldn't fix.


See? A happy tough little girl.

Where were you...

They say everyone will remember where they were eight years ago. I always will.

I was working as a para-professional in a special education preschool classroom. I was helping my sweet little J, a three-year-old with Autism, pull velcroed juice-can lids off of a felt board and maneuver them into the slot cut in the lid of a crisco can. Special ed classrooms are so resourceful!

Our kids arrived just before 9, and the first part of the morning was often the busiest, so both towers had been stuck by the time we heard anything. The principal stuck her head in the door to tell us about the tragedy unfolding at the World Trade Center, and that there were confused news reports about the Pentagon. Although I can not remember her exact words, I remember her face and the fear that gripped us all as she told us that we were under attack.

My first thought was for the children under our care. I know it might sound silly, as if someone would strategically take out a little school in Ohio, but at the time we didn't know how widespread these attacks might be. We didn't know if there was more to come- by air or something else. We didn't "lock-down" or anything like that, but there was this sense that we were responsible for more than ourselves- and since I wasn't a parent at the time, it was a new feeling for me.

My second thought was about DaddyClay. At the time we had only been dating for a little over a month. He grew up outside of DC; his family still lives there. I wanted to check to see if he had heard from his family. I also just wanted to hear his voice. But when I called his cell-phone, the call wouldn't go through. So many people were calling loved ones, the lines were overloaded. I remembered that I had the number to his apartment in Birmingham in my wallet, so I tried again. He was just getting up and ready for class when he found out what was going on. He stayed in that morning, watching coverage.

We took turns slipping across the hall to the conference room where the TV was in constant "Special Report" mode. I remember praying and crying, watching the people hopelessly jumping from the towers. I can still see snapshots in my head of the video, played over & over, of the plane colliding with one of the towers or of the first tower collapsing. If I remember correctly, there were moments of hope when they thought the second tower would stay standing. It did not.

All of us went home that day and turned on the television for more information. But there were some questions that news anchors, first responders, even the president, just couldn't answer. There still are.

When we visited NYC for our 5th anniversary,
hubby and I visited ground zero and the Tribute WTC Visitor Center. Though it had been six years since the attacks, there was still a lot of construction going on. The visitor center was a beautiful tribute- there were times when the grief of the experience made it hard to breathe, but at the end there was a gallery entitled "Voices of Promise" that offered hope. Reminded me of the good in people. Helped me find my breath again.

Today, I pray for all of those affected by this tragedy 8 years ago. That they too, can find hope. That they are surrounded by love and goodness. That, slowly, they are catching their breath.

And that we will never forget their story.

Big Backyard or A Whole New World?

A few nights ago when I tucked Big Sister into bed, I told her that a new Your Big Backyard magazine had arrived and we could look through it together in the morning.

But I accidentally called it Ranger Rick, so then I had to explain that Ranger Rick is the same type of magazine, but for older kids- like 7 or 8.

She asked me what older kids who were 60 (I hope someone calls me an "older kid" when I'm that age!) might read instead of Your Big Backyard or Ranger Rick, and I guessed National Geographic. (If anyone is interested, the "grown-up" publication of the NWF is actually just called National Wildlife and it comes with your membership.)

I tried to close the conversation and tuck her in, but after I kissed her goodnight she asked, "Can I have Ranger Rick when I'm bigger?" and when I agreed, she continued, "You mean when I'm eight and have my rabbit and my pet tiger?"

The rabbit was one of those discussions I was hoping she would forget, when I said that maybe when she could help take care of a rabbit, we would look into having one for a pet.

I'm pretty sure we never had the same conversation about a tiger. Darn Aladdin movie...

It's a Blog Hop!

One of those oh-so-clever ladies on the Mckmama forum has started a fun blog hop. Want to play along? Just follow the rules and add your post to the McLinky (click on it for directions.)

Here are the rules, from Jamie's blog:
Go to the place where you upload all your photos. If you don’t upload them online, just go to wherever you store your pics on your computer. Open the oldest album, and post the first photo. Tell the story behind it. Grab the MckLinky and post it on your blog. Just for fun, tag 3 people you want to see old photos of :)

So here is my picture:



That's me in the back. Second from the right. Mother Goose.

It was from my sophomore year of college, at a not-so-scary Halloween event called the Enchanted Forest. There was a place in Georgetown that hosted a Haunted Forest every year, and they'd pay a fraternity to staff it. For a few years, they also had this Enchanted Forest, which was a walk through nursery rhymes and fairy tales. It was a project for the frat's "Little Sis" organization.

I LOVE this picture for a few different reasons. For one, I really enjoyed doing this. As Mother Goose, I got to lead each group through the forest. It was a combination of tour guide, children's theater, and improv, and it was one of those moments I truly felt "in my element." I was sad when it was all over!

Another reason I love to remember the Enchanted Forest is because the first time I worked there was a turning point in my time in college. I was a homesick, lonely freshmanl with a back-home boyfriend, sitting on my computer (and the internet was really not all that exciting back then) and calling my mom. I had made a few friends on a freshman retreat through campus ministries, but I didn't feel like I was a part of any group yet. And I didn't know if I even wanted to be.

Then some of my new friends, some of them older, came and coerced me into coming with them to help with this haunted house thing. Soon I was hanging out in the PHA lobby, staying up too late, and hoping I would be a little sis. I found a place, made lots of new friends, took on leadership roles, dated new guys, and blossomed. I credit that first night at the Enchanted Forest as one of the reasons I am who I am today!

Plus, it reminds me that there are some people with whom we will stay connected, and that there are others... well... I'll just say that there are a few people in the picture that I don't miss. There's one girl that I remember being very intimidating, only now I can't even remember her name! Ha! So I guess it's a nice reminder not to let people get the best of you, because while the ones who are worth keeping around will be there, others come & go throughout life. And that's sometimes just fine.

I could go on, but I'm not really sure how interested my fellow blog-hoppers are in hearing my "back in the day" stories. I'll just tag a few of you. I'm picking from the people I think might visit my blog- so SJ, Brown-eyed Pea, and... ooh- Nikki! Yeah. I want to see your old photos. Ready? Hop!

Mom's Morning Out

I've mentioned a few times now about some recent craziness in our lives. One of the things that has made life a little more hectic lately is a new work/ministry opportunity for me.

I am now the director of our church's brand new Mom's Morning Out program. On the days when the girls are in school, I'll be running this new ministry so that moms in our church and community can have some time to themselves. It runs from 9-12, so after everyone goes home, I'll still have a little of that time to myself, too.

Today was our first day. We had four adults- two paid workers (me & my assistant) and two co-op workers. (Moms can work shifts to earn time to send their kids later, offering them a less costly alternative and helping me have enough grown-ups!)

I was expecting five kids, but we ended up with seven! We're growing already! Next week we should have three more.

The day went very smoothly. It was almost too smooth, making me wonder if I missed something. But I'm not going to spend too much time wondering- I've got more planning and paperwork to do.

If you're local and you're interested in Mom's Morning Out, let me know! I'm so excited about it- I'd love to share more.

Speaking to schoolchildren...

This is a post I wrote for a forum discussion about Obama's upcoming address to schoolchildren and all of the concerned parents threatening to keep their kids out of school. Some of the word choices are in reference to other posts, but I don't think they too hard to figure out.


I find this all to be a little silly. The public schools are funded and run by the government. So why is it so off the wall that the head of the executive branch of the government might want to talk to the kids in the schools? ABOUT schools? He isn't going to tell your kids to go home & tell mommy & daddy to vote for health care reform. He isn't going to tell them to keep abortion legal. He isn't "advancing his agenda."

He is the POTUS. He won the electoral votes and the right to do his best to lead our country. Whether we voted for him or not, we do need to "back him." Not in the sense that we blindly follow or get gassed, as someone so eloquently put it. But also not teaching our children that it is okay to disrespect people they disagree with, especially those in authority. Disagreeing is fine. But respectfully. And respect equals hearing other points of view.

Honestly, those of you who don't want your kids to watch- if you previewed it & found it to be a nice, inspiring speech, would you let your kids watch it? Or would you keep it from them because you don't want them to think positively about him AT ALL?

All other presidents address the nation, speak to schools, etc. My husband & I watched in class as Reagan addressed the nation when the challenger exploded. My husband also went to the White House for a D.A.R.E. graduation in the rose garden- where Bush 1 spoke. On 9/11, George W. Bush was reading to kids in a school. Do you think there were permission slips to "opt out" of that one? No- it was an awesome opportunity to see that the president cared about kids & education. Same thing here. Children need to see their country's government in action. They need to see the president.

Worry about your kids coming home having heard too much about the birds & the bees. Worry about metal detectors or out of date textbooks. But to act like Obama is going to brainwash our kids or try to convert them to future liberals? Have more faith in our president than that. Or at least in your own abilities to teach & shape your children.


And later, after someone said they thought he was "going after the children" because they are the future of our country...

"I believe the children are our future..." :) Except they can't vote. Or contribute money. By the time they will be able to vote, he will not be anywhere near the white house. And they don't have that much sway over those who CAN vote or contribute- you all don't buy everything your child thinks they need from commercials, right? So I have to respectfully disagree when people say that he is gearing up for the next election or pushing his agenda by focusing on elementary school kids.

As a first grade teacher, I actually saw what 6-year-olds understood about politics first hand, during the 2004 elections. In our particular school, most of them came in completely demonizing John Kerry. One little boy told me, "He's a gay and he wants to make us all gay." Nevermind he wasn't even sure what made a person gay or straight. Another little girl, whose parents were Kerry supporters, sat in the back of the room and cried, because she was completely alone in thinking that this man was ok.

How much more frightening must it be, then, to be a 6-year-old and not understand any of this, and now know that this "horrible" person is your president? When I was a kid, no matter who your parents voted for, you thought the president was amazing. You wanted to be just like him when you grew up. Now our country is so polarized, we're teaching our kids that instead of looking up to the president, they should be worried about him. Terrified of what he is going to do to our country. They shouldn't listen to or believe anything he says. Seriously?

We can all have our opinions. We can all even share them with our kids (although with caution- while I think a previous poster was right, and that they don't fully understand a lot of things, I also think they worry a lot more than we realize.) But when we start telling our children they can skip school or leave a class because we didn't vote for that guy and we don't like what he's going to say... I think we're sending a message to them that is worse than anything he might mention in his speech.

Another thing: You're right that many people did not "back" Bush. But they were also labeled unamerican and unpatriotic. Heck, there are country music stations here in the south that still won't play the Dixie Chicks. To be clear, I'm not saying anyone here on this thread hates America or any of that nonsense. I'm just saying it works both ways. Many of the people I know who got really angry at Sheryl Crow for example don't think twice about calling Obama "Hitler." It's all disrespectful, it's all divisive, and it's all, well... politics as usual, I suppose.

Bottom line, no, he's not speaking directly to our kids individually. But we are. What will we be telling them?

Song for Sunday

Faithful To Me
by Jennifer Knapp

All the chistles I've dulled carving idols of stone
That have crumbled like sand 'neath the waves.
I've recklessly built all my dreams in the sand just to watch, them all wash away.

Through another day, another trial, another chance to reconcile
To one who sees past all I see.
And reaching out my weary hand I pray that you'd understand
You're the only one who's faithful to me.

All the pennies I've wasted in my wishing well
I have thrown like stones to the sea.
I have cast my lots, dropped my guard, searched aimlessly for a faith
To be faithful to me.

Through another day, another trial, another chance to reconcile
To one who sees past all I see.
And reaching out my weary hand I pray that you'd understand
You're the only one who's faithful to me.
You're the only one who's faithful to me.

Simple as a nursery rhyme...

... it's Jack & Jill time!

For those of you who don't know, Jack & Jill is a seasonal consignment sale here in town. It is the best! Last year I consigned some clothes for the first time, though not many. I just cleaned out a few things that were the wrong seasons for the girls or that never quite fit, along with some extra baby things. My reason wasn't to make money, although I made about $75. It was to shop before everybody else!

This year, I got to shop even earlier. I'm working a few shifts at the sale this year, so I got to shop tonight at 5:30. It was amazing! I actually saw the sale before anyone else (except the owner and those workers who set up, obviously). When our group of workers went into the building, we had the first pick of everything. It was awesome. And overwhelming! Where to start?

First, I went to the big stuff, because it always goes early. I found a Little Tykes kitchen (our girls have a kitchen but it is older and a lot more cumbersome). For $20 I found one that is like new, and I can donate our other to our new Mom's Morning Out room, where there is a lot more space. (And a need- I know, cause I'm the new director! More to come about that one...)

I also found a cute little plastic vanity and seat for $3! Other big stuff I bought: a rolling trunk filled with Duplo blocks (something we never had for Big Sister) and a cool art table with a stool, a roll of paper, and two cups for paint or storing markers & crayons. I also got a few other toys: a horse & carriage for Big Sister's princess Barbies (that will need some work), a doll stroller and some plastic food for the MMO room, and something else for Little Sis which I can't remember at this particular moment in time. The toys for the girls will be for Christmas, along with a few other things. Big Sister is saying she wants an American Girl this year- thanks McDonald's Happy Meal!

Then I went on to the clothes. We are very fortunate to have some awesome families in the church that pass clothing down to my girls. So I already had a few very cute things for this fall. And of course, since I've kept almost all of Big Sister's things, Little Sis is pretty much set. But I did find some great outfits for Big Sis to wear to school. I got two Gymboree outfits- one with three pieces. I got four play outfits: track suits, knit pants & tops, etc. I found her Christmas dress and three other darling dresses; two of them are jumpers with cute tops underneath. I got two darling sweaters. And finally, I found some cute thermal pjs with princesses on them for $2.

I couldn't leave Little Sis out, so I did find her some brand new pjs and a cute (though worn) outfit. I also found a short-sleeved one piece outfit from Gymboree that will be perfect for these still-warm early autumn days we'll be having for quite awhile. But my favorite find this year? While looking in the 4s for Big Sister, I came across a hand-made boutique style outfit with beautiful fall colors and Little Sister's monogram! I never find her name- anywhere. It will be a while before she can wear it, but I am still very excited about it!

So, after all of these purchases- the big furniture stuff, the wardrobe for Big Sister, the toys, and some cute stuff for Little Sis- can you guess what I spent? $140.

I've saved so much, I think I'll go back.

"There you go" Thursday...

what? You've never seen "There you go" Thursday before?

That's cause I just made it up. Just now. Just for you.

Er, and because I am having the stinkiest writer's block lately.

So here's how it works. I'll ask a question, and then I'll answer it. There you go. Simple- like this:


Have you ever wondered why the bird feeders and windchimes at cute gift shops or at the hardware stores are so expensive? I mean, why pay $15 for a set of windchimes for the porch if I can get a small set at Wal-Mart for $4.97? What could possibly cause a $10 price difference?

There you go.

Expiration dates

The 31st of August is an important deadline; it's the day when all of the coupons in the School Coupon Books expire! A few days before, I always tear out the ones I think I might possibly be able to use and make a plan. This year, I had a whole stack for fun times downtown. It included the Creative Discovery Museum, a trip to World Next Door, hot dogs from a tiny (yummy) hole-in-the-wall stand, ice cream, and some shopping at the green grocery store.

Then reality hit, and I remembered that my children desperately need naps (or for Big Sis, downtime) in the afternoon. So I modified a little bit. We went to the museum, where the girls had a great time (even though it was short) and hung out with Curious George:

Big Sister took the one of me & Little Sis. In case you hadn't already figured that out...


Then we went to my favorite store, (everyone say it with me:) World Next Door, which was an adventure because it involved two adults and three loose children (double strollers just don't make it far into the store) in a store with lots of tiny and breakable things. (Hope & Shepherd had joined us after their class at the museum.)

I found some adorable Global Mama dresses for the girls that were half-off. That meant my coupon didn't work, but that was just an excuse to buy something else! I settled for some Land of A Thousand Hills coffee, which I've been meaning to try for some time now.

Here is a picture of the girls in their dresses. Please disregard the pink tennis shoes on Little Sister's feet; she is obsessed with shoes and must be wearing a pair- any pair- all the time. Also, disregard Big Sister's tense face as she attempts to get her little sister to stay in the shot:


After the shopping, we headed to the little hot dog stand for lunch. But not really. Because I had forgotten that they only take cash. Which I never use or carry. I even walked a few blocks to the closest ATM, but it didn't work either. So I ended up loading my children back into the van, giving them some diaper bag snacks, and heading home for lunch.

The good news? We had a great time and got out of the house. Oh- and they both slept like logs after all the excitement. I think we'll head downtown more often!