I've want to write a meaningful, thought provoking post.
But I'm feeling stuck.
I have more cute pictures of my kids, but my last three or more posts have been cute pictures of my kids. And although I LOVE my kids and could look at them all day (oh wait, I DO!) I also need to be more than just my childrens' photographer/event-narrator.
I could talk about my recent decluttering and organization efforts. About all of the dustbunnies I have eliminated under beds and at the bottom of closets, all of the things that have made their way into a giant moving box headed to Goodwill, and all of the plans I have for places in my house to tackle next.
Or I could blog once more about discipline and the girls' behavior. I haven't said much since the other day when I shared about Big Sister's smileys. But "no news is good news." Things are going a little better on that front.
The truth is, I want to think deeper and share my heart about something completely unrelated to Mommy-dom.
But I also
DON'T want to.
I don't want to think about all of the terrible images I've seen of oil seeping into the beautiful blue water in the gulf and into the wetlands and swamps and little animal homes. I don't want to think of the global impact and eventual ramifications. I definitely don't want to think about the people at BP, moving about as quickly as a bored teenager selling smoothies at the mall as they work to solve this problem- about the greed and deception that allowed this problem to happen in the first place.
Because it makes me feel angry. And helpless. And a little hopeless.
The same thing happens when I read about the continued humanitarian crisis in the Sudan, or listen to a
story on NPR about the diminished funding for AIDS organizations in Africa (just as they had started to see some progress!) or hear of a case of child abuse and neglect on the evening news.
I don't want to think about it.
Fortunately (and unfortunately?), most of us don't
have to think about it. None of these tragedies are in my back yard (although, come hurricane season, who knows where that oil might end up.) So we change the channel. We read about Al & Tipper (or Sandra & Jesse, or Jon & Kate) instead of
Kingston and
Gaza. We turn on the ballgame, or we head to the mall, and we pour countless hours and dollars into keeping ourselves blissfully ignorant.
But ignorance isn't really bliss.
Because, to use another trite saying, just because we
don't hear choose to ignore the tree in the forest... well, it doesn't mean it didn't fall. And these things that have been troubling me- they affect a lot more than just trees.
So, I don't know about you, but I can't sit still. I can't enjoy my fluffy television or my trashy work of fiction. I can't even post one more darling picture of my children on a fancy inflatable waterslide (
today, anyway. I'll do it tomorrow!) Because it's not helping to drown out the echoes of falling timber.
I
have think about it.
We have to think about it. To think about the devastated wetlands and oil-covered marine life. To imagine the eyes of children looking into their mothers' faces wondering when they might eat again, or worse, watching those mothers die of preventable or even treatable diseases. It's time to get out a big map and remind ourselves of all of the countries facing unrest or genocide or famine.
And to remember that God doesn't distract Himself with ridiculous nonsense. He doesn't even
take a nap to escape it all. He is there, among the suffering. He is mourning the loss of His children and His creation. And He is most certainly also mourning the inaction- and especially the apathy- of "His people."
We're not
all apathetic. I mean, I
do care. That's actually
why I don't want to think about it. It breaks my heart and I get so discouraged and want to
do something. But what can one little housewife do to stop a massive oil spill or stop AIDS or put a halt to ethnic cleansing? I'd rather think about organizing my linen closet-
that is something I can fix! I feel so small, and the problems seem so big.
Of course, God is bigger. But that in itself can get discouraging too. Because, if God
can fix it, and if God
cares about it, why is it still happening? I start to ask, "Why aren't You doing anything about this?!"
But I get two answers. The first is a question. The same question, actually. Thrown back to me. With the third word uncapitalized and in italics.
The second answer is that God
is doing something: mobilizing some of His people. And, even now, He is showing more of His people the hurt and need in the world. He has given them (us) countless resources to help. And He is waiting for us to flesh out
that prayer that we recite so often from rote memorization, you know with the part that says:
"
Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven."
Heck, maybe He is just waiting for us to
mean it when we pray it.
That's all I'm going to be able to
do about any of these huge problems today... pray.
And
think. Stop avoiding reality and living in my own little suburban bubble. Remember Christ's passion for the poor and the broken and ask for a heart like His.
Bob Pierce, founder of Samaritan's Purse, is said to be the originator of this prayer: "Lord, break my heart with the things that break yours."
Will you join me in praying this dangerous prayer? That God will break our hearts and move us to action?
In later posts, I'll share some of the small changes my family has made to try to do our part in impacting the big problems. But even Richard Stearns, president of World Vision and the man who wrote the book I reviewed here, says that
he can forget about the suffering around him after a few days in the office or at home. It takes a constant, conscious decision to remember the needs of others.
So let's think.
And pray.
