My husband is NOT Edward Cullen

If you've paid attention to pop culture in the last few years at all, you should have at least heard of Edward and his family of vampires from the Twilight Saga.

I actually googled "Edward Cullen" a while back, when I added the Pieces of Flair app on Facebook and wondered why every third button had to do with this Edward guy. Many of them said something like, "Edward Cullen is my boyfriend."

Internet search completed, I saw he was from Twilight. At first I thought, that teenage vampire fiction junk. Then, fast forward a year or two and many of my mommy friends have read the books. And, well, are mildly obsessed. So, I decided googling was not enough. I had to read and find out what the hype was all about.

The hype is that Edward Cullen is perfect. The stories are decently written, and there are twists and turns and even a love triangle. But the thing that sells the books- that makes everyone fall in love with Twilight- is that everyone falls in love with Edward.

I wish I could say I was immune, but I read the entire series in 10 days and then went back and started again. When I filled Hubby in about the premise, he was both confused, "So the werewolves and the vampires are enemies? And you're reading this because?" and concerned.

But, as perfect as Edward is, I was not one of those Twi-hard wives who compared her hubby to Edward. You know, because he is fiction.

But this morning, laying wide awake at 4:25 AM, I started to think... and compare... and wish...

Not for Hubby to have Edward's pale & perfect body- I find my husband perfectly attractive just the way he is. (Although, I think he might opt for Cullen's never messed up, perfectly toussled hair.)

And not for him to have the super-strength of the vampires Meyer created in her books, although it would make me worry a lot less about the sounds in our house at night.

I didn't wish for my husband to be able to hear thoughts, although it would prevent a lot of fights, I'm sure. (Of course, it might start a lot of new ones, too!)

Obviously, I did not wish for my husband to have the unique diet of the Cullen family, or to be frozen at 30 for the rest of time. I do believe he will live forever, but in a totally different way.

So why, this morning, did I begin to compare my wonderful husband to a fictional creature and object of many women's desire?

Simple.

As I listened to my husband thump out of bed, tiredly get dressed and ready to go to the hospital with other ministers before someone's very early admission for surgery, I held my breath and hoped he did not wake the girls.

I heard him step on noisy, squeaky step number one. And then number two. And a moment later, I heard a ginormous crash. Followed by some muttering, some (sort of) quieter moving around, and finally the loud opening & closing of the front door. I also heard a few sighs coming from the opposite direction- the baby monitor on our bookshelf.

And in that weird inbetween state, as I tried to fall back asleep but also soaked in every sound, I thought of one thing.

Edward could move extremely quickly and silently.




I love you honey! :)